Wednesday, September 20, 2006
The predator known as pride
Pride is likely one of the most significant enemies to small business. Pride has this terrible habit of not allowing the small business person to admit mistakes, accept criticism or hear good advice when it is offered. I do my very best to remain open and even humble yet I cannot escape the predator known as pride.
Pride is not a bad thing when it causes us to be professional and thorough! It can inspire us to create a business that is better than our competition. Pride can drive us to excel and work harder on what we are so proud of. Alternatively, pride can interfere with the open acceptance of input from friends, family and peers. I can create a wall between great ideas for innovation and the status quo.
I'm proud of my accomplishments and take pride in my knowledge of the internet, marketing, sales online small business and general management. I've been involved in sales and marketing since 1990 and have been online since 1988. I've owned, co-owned, worked for, consulted with and managed a number of businesses in a wide variety of industries and this gives me a unique perspective on the many factors that affect a small business. I should be proud of what I've accomplished, right? I think so, but when it causes me to close my mind to people who may not have as much experience or knowledge it becomes an enemy.
Some of the greatest and innovative ideas for business can come from the people who know very little about the business! Many times it's the lack of knowledge that allows so called outsiders to look at the business from a different angle or perspective. My children, spouse, friends, partners and subordinates have all offered beautiful ideas throughout my professional life that have caused me to pause and rethink a plan or situation. Some times however, I close my mind because the advice being offered is coming from someone who has no knowledge or worse, has a little knowledge but no experience to back up the advice. I judge and convict the messenger at the expense of the message. This is not good.
My point? I received some advice recently that I have avoided for a long time. In hindsight I realize that many people have offered this advice to me in a number of ways. Friends would tip toe around the issue so as to not hurt my feelings and I wonder how many close friends avoided it all together just to prevent hurt feelings, by either the sender or receiver. It's good advice really, basic advice, fundamental advice and even something I already knew. Somehow I avoided it because I knew what I was doing and no one else knew better than I.
"I know what I'm doing so don't even go there" was not only my mindset, but also my attitude that prevented even the people who loved me from offering this advice. My own pride not only prevented me from hearing the advice, it even prevented some people from offering it. This is amazing to me considering how intentional I am in my efforts to listen, remain open and even attempt to subordinate myself to others. I make every effort to value everyone in my heart and mind just so I don't become this arrogant ass that my personality traits tend to guide me.
This advice? It's hard to explain but still very simple. Basically, it is that I need to be more concerned with my own business than everyone else's; that I need to make some time for my own company as much or more so than I do for clients, friends and family; that I work so hard for others that I have neglected my own is what some people suggest.
What brought this to light was when one of my best friends in the world told me that my own website looked like crap yesterday at lunch. It's true! I was able to put CarriedAwayVacations.com online in a matter of minutes with a great layout and a professional presentation yet my site wouldn't sell an idea much less professional web development. I even spent last night researching a potential clients needs while still forgetting my own.
How did pride play a role in all this? I had convinced myself that it was a better strategy to concentrate on clients than my own website. My professional opinion was that because people come to me through my client sites or direct referrals, that I didn't need to spend all that much time on my own site. I was of the opinion that my work would speak louder than any self promoting presentation online. Boy... was I stupid!
This morning as I considered a meeting I have later today with a potential client, I remembered my lunch meeting yesterday and realized that not only did my friend offer some great advice, but it took great courage to do so. Why was it it so courageous? Because my pride created an obstacle that many people would not attempt simply because of emotions, feelings and/or the fear of insulting me. Don't get me wrong, many have tried, and many have said exactly what my friend said, but it wasn't until this morning that it all came together and forced me to admit that I could be wrong.
My own pride, I wonder how much business it cost me? I wonder how many people judged me based on my own stubborn opinion that I didn't need a professional representation of my own ability. Oh, I justified my decision through the logic that I was being modest and humble by not self promoting, yet in the end it was pride in that decision and conceited stubbornness that prevented me to truly hearing and accepting the advice of others. As hard as I tried to be accessible and humble, I still fell victim to the predator known as pride. I wonder how many other valuable and sincere offerings I have ignored because I already knew what I was doing. It makes a man think and wonder... and yes, it makes a man learn from his mistakes.
Now you know what I'll be working on today.
